Standing (Six Feet Apart) on One Leg
Torah for Dealing with a Virus 3/19/2020
In the past couple of days, I have been reading so much that I have forgotten what I read. That’s not usually an problem but when I cut and paste a note without attribution, that is a problem. So, in the spirit of fairness, whoever wrote this nugget, please accept my pre-emptive apologies because I have no idea who you are. But what you wrote is wonderful:
‘There are so many “what ifs” that we contend with every day. What if I have Coronavirus? What if a bus hits me? What if I get in a car accident? What if the plane I am on crashes? What if I get ZIKA virus? What if I get bitten by a tick and get Lyme disease? What if somebody breaks into my house? What if my neighbors are looking into my windows? What if someone doesn’t like me? What if I offend someone? What if the wrong candidate wins the presidential race? What if the wrong country takes over all international trade? What if the polar ice caps melt? What if strip mining destroys all the forests? What if I have bad breath and underarm odor? WHAT IF???!!!
We live in a culture of fear. Fear is used as a tool to get page views, TV program viewers, advertiser dollars, and most of all to get you to buy things.
“If you use body lotion on your face, the skin of your face will become…” What will it become? Skin?
“If you do not buy this home security system, burglars will choose your house instead of your neighbor’s house…” According to whose statistics? And you think thieves are really afraid of a cardboard sign and some rent-a-cops?
“If you eat a conventional apple instead of an organic apple, you will get cancer and die!” Nope. No you won’t.
“If I let my child go anywhere or do anything by himself, he will get abducted and/or ruin his own prospects for his future…” If you never let your child learn independence, and street smarts, and how to manage himself, you might end up with an adult child depending on you.
“If I wear the wrong shoes to this wedding, everyone will think I am a dork and that I don’t have any money to buy shoes…” So what? So what if they think you’re a dork with no money? If that’s all they have to think about, you’re hanging out with the wrong crowd.
The culture of fear is not reality. Reality is much higher, bigger, and more interesting than the culture of fear. If you’re tired of living in the shadows of all the what ifs, the only sustainable and effective option you have is to distance yourself from the what ifs and explore reality. Get to know yourself, get to know your soul and its Creator, and illuminate your corner of the world. Self-defense and activism certainly can help you to feel more secure — I’m not telling you to stick your head in the sand and become a defenseless victim — but you have to see them as part of a bigger picture.
Do your part, and recognize what you do and do not have control over.’
I don’t know who wrote this but I love it. We can end up worrying ourselves into a fit. To what end? When the Apollo 13 spacecraft almost blew itself apart, a very calm Jim Lovell sensed the anxiety of the other two crew members. He said to them, ‘Panicking won’t do anything. After your panic attack, we will still be in the same place.’ Wise words on this first full week of isolation.
Our Sages called this “hishtavut hanefesh” – equanimity, equal calm, even keel. You get the idea. A collegue explored this idea when he wrote: “Throughout Rabbinic literature, our Sages place a high value on this quality of character.. In the Book of Micah we find a verse often seen as a summary of our Jewish faith: “Do justly, love mercy, walk humbly with thy God” (Micah 6:8)…Commenting on the last verse, the Rabbis asked, “What does it mean to ‘walk humbly with thy God?’ ” It means, they said, “to escort the dead to the grave and lead the bride to the bridal chamber” (see Babylonian Talmud, Sukkah 49b).
What unites these two examples is that they are peak emotional experiences. Accompanying one to the grave can cause grief, while escorting a bride is a great joy. “To walk humbly” in each circumstance is to do so with an inner equanimity and stability, a recognition that life is filled with moments of great happiness and sadness. That is not to say that we should not cry at a funeral or dance at a wedding-far from it. Rather, it is to understand that emotions have their proper time and place. To become endlessly consumed in grief is to lose hope in the future, and to become giddy with joy is to lose touch with the reality of life’s difficult times. It is no accident that we break a glass at a wedding and eat maror on Passover.”
In this time of coronavirus as so many of us are self-isolating, worried about our children and grandchildren, our friends or ourselves, there are lots of emotions to contend with. Embrace those emotions and recognize them. But if we allow ourselves to be dominated by them, we will be unable to cope with the present situation.
I guess it is not surprising that one way we are supposed to greet each other is with Mr. Spock’s ‘Live Long and Prosper’ greeting as described in the Torah. After all, Mr. Spock tried all his life to repress his emotions. Emotions toss us as waves toss us. But any good sailor will tell you, keep your eye on the horizon and hand on the till.
